Teacher: why don’t you rub teabags on your homework to make it look older? Or you could burn it!
Me: ha! Sir, did I tell you what happened last time I tried to do that?
Sir: no? Why, Estelle, what did you do?
Me: well… I almost burnt the house down
Sir: I don’t want to know do I?
Me: nope! -goes back to doing work-